Pig Roast

I was headed downtown about a week ago when I noticed a sign outside a local community garden that said, “free pig roast”. Now there are two types of people in this world, those who go to free pig roasts and vegans¹ fools. Sign me up.

As it turned out I was already signed up. Twice in fact. Corrinne, who is generally aware of things weeks before me, was already planning for us to attend, and my business partner had already volunteered our photography services to cover the event for Athens Community Connection.

Here’s a good question, how do you get people to fill out a survey? This is the south, if you want to get people to come together, start cooking — maybe roast 200lb locally raised pig? It’s as good an idea as any.

The conspiracy minded, of which there are more than a few around these parts, would not have liked the pig roast, since it was was not technically free. In order to get your pig roast you had to fill out a health survey of non-invasive, non-personally identifying questions about your general health and access to health care.

The free pig roast was, you see, a con by the big bad local government community services group. And yes, there was the survey; something mandated by the Affordable Care Act, which did not, as I understand it specify that a pig be roasted. Athens Community Connection was simply erring on the safe side with the pig.

Plus cookies. Don’t forget the cookies.

I found some of the survey questions a little tricky. For example, “do you have access to dental care?” Well, I have access to the ATL airport, and a quick flight to Mexico City would put me around some top quality dentists I could afford and the whole thing, trip and all, would come out to less than a local dentist, plus, tacos… so… yes?

The pig roast turned out to be so popular that it ran out of pig by 5pm. Fortunately we just barely made it and were able to get all the pig we wanted. And a damn fine pig it was, roasted up by Noah Brendel of (now defunct) Four Coursemen fame. There were also some awesome collard greens, baked beans and macaroni and cheese from the Northeast Georgia Food Bank. The local Daily Groceries Co-op even donated some halfway decent vegan sides. We’re an inclusive community like that.